date: 02/02/2025
mood: in research mode
progress on the trans joy jam game is coming along nicely! I finished my first background today :D I also had a weekend with my dad and he hired a mobility scooter for me to try out. it worked really nicely and reduced my fatigue a lot, so I think Something Powered would definitely work well, but I think I'd prefer a power chair? you can use it indoors as well as outdoors, and you don't have to hold your arms out to control it. they're so expensive though... the one I'm looking at is really cool because it has suspension and big ol' wheels and it handles curbs super well, but it's about 4000 pounds minimum
I keep telling myself that this is the exact kind of thing my DLA money is for, but I'm still so nervous about spending so much. there's a mobility showroom about an hour away that has the chair I'm interested in, so I might ask mum if we can go so I can try it out :) but we'll see
date: 29/01/2025
mood: ???? sleepy??
I'm into making games now? apparently? I'm on the devtalk discord and they were like 'we're doing a trans joy game jam that starts on the 1st of february!' and I was like 'TRANS, YOU SAY' so I've been prepping for that. it's going to be about d&d and silly little teenagers :)
date: 28/01/2025
mood: tired
it has been a whopping EIGHT (8) days and I have already had several major life developments. that is mostly a joke but seriously I've been doing a lot (considering this is objectively The Worst Month for me, physically speaking)
so naturally, I was sitting there in my fatigue pit and daytime pyjamas, only able to go outside once every few days, and said: hey I'm going to learn godot. you know, the game engine with a completely different skillset to anything I've done before. WHY
I mean I'm having a good time but like??? the AUDACITY of my brain to demand More mental stimulation. please god I am already so stimulated. anyway yes I've been following a very helpful tutorial by brackeys and I found a really good platformer controller on itch.io (it's got built-in gravity and coyote time and stuff like that), so I've actually got a playable prototype already! it's probably gonna be a really small game just so I can figure out how the whole process works, but I'm actually excited (???) to keep working on it. wild.
date: 20/01/2025
mood: greedy
sorry I'm doing two entries in one day. it's been like 2 hours. anyway yeah I am contemplating the idea of getting Some Manner of iMac! I am currently typing this on my laptop, which does function quite well all things considered but creaks slightly when I move it, which isn't great
I only got an ipad pro recently and that was refurbished but it was still a lot more money than I'm usually comfy spending on non-essentials? (like...800 quid I think) not that much in comparison to other stuff - it truly amazes me how much people spend on brand new equipment sometimes - but still, I only get so much money from the government every month and I don't want to waste it when I can do just as well with older tech. my 'project' this summer will hopefully be moving the desk from my old bedroom into my new one, so maybe I'll get one then!
date: 20/01/2025
mood: cheery
today was pretty good! I woke up late but I managed to do some coding and I've worked out how this variables thing works in ren'py so I'm feeling quite good about things in general
also I did get a little notebook to write things down and it's been very helpful! 10/10, everyone should have a little notebook
date: 16/01/2025
mood: tired but inspired (hoho a rhyme)
didn't go out today, but I felt a little bit better than I did yesterday (yesterday was BAD bad physically speaking). it's warming up now, I think, so I can only go up from here! maybe soon my knees will not feel like corner pieces of metal pipe
also I'm getting back into doing ren'py stuff! I think it'd be cool to try making a little project to get to grips with everything, so I've started thinking of ideas for that, but it's HARDDDD. I've been reading a thing on how variables work, too, and I dunno if it's just me being tired but Man this stuff is hard to remember. I think I'm gonna get a notebook from my local bookshop because a. it helps me remember stuff and b. I like going there :]
date: 13/01/2025
mood: eepy
I was meaning to go to the library today (I want to see if that book on frances glessner lee's dioramas is in the system anywhere) but it was too cold to go out :( well. that and my new alarm clock didn't go off, because I forgot to press the button that would actually make the alarm work.
I at least managed to practice a bit of pixel art! and I added my resources page, too. all in all a pretty okay day, but I want to do more tomorrow
date: 11/01/2025
mood: somewhat unwisely ambitious
another super cold day! almost like it's january or something. crazy. anyway someone on reddit gave me some theme switcher code so I'm gonna attempt to make that work either today or tomorrow!
and I spontaneously decided that when rpg maker have a sale, I'm going to get it (probably ace vx?). I'd get it now, because it does seem very user-friendly, but I'm worried that the user-friendly-ness of it could mean I get sucked into it, aaand I have stuff I actually want to be doing. so it's just an 'in future' thing for now! I think it'd be neat to try making a game, but I get sidetracked really easily — this website is evidence of that — and I'd like to try staying as focused as I can, loath as I am to do it.
date: 10/01/2025
mood: cold
so despite the fact I'm incredibly cold and VERY sleepy I decided now would be the perfect time to make an updated journal/blog page. I mean I made one so I guess it worked out?? but goodness what an ordeal
anyway, I'm probably just going to play the sims 4 for the rest of the day. I'm trying the just desserts legacy again and it's pretty fun! I'm changing up the rules for storytelling purposes, and it's gonna be my first time trying to run a restaurant so that's fuuuun